American traslation: Julia and Ellen
Our family translation: Mikayla and Caden's big sisters for 3 weeks
(July 25- August 13)
When I got the phone call from an Eastern Christian employee asking us to take in 2 teenage Korean girls for 3 weeks the first thoughts that came to mind were, "No way! We don't do things like that". Of course I couldn't be rude so after learning that our vacation interfered with the first 3 days I thought we were off the hook. They came up with a solution for that. Then I thought that after learning that I not only didn't have 2 extra beds but I didn't have a spare room either, we were for sure off the hook. "That's not a problem". Oh, shoot, I am fresh out of excuses. So Brian and I began discussing it. A few days later, (I think that's a record for our decision making) we decided that we couldn't let fear dictate our lives any longer and we said yes. I tried so hard not to let the fear and stress of it overwhelm me. I think it helped that our minds were clearly occupied while away so I didn't have a lot of extra time on my hands. On our way home from Iowa the questions started flooding in. Where were these girls going to sleep? After a few options were discarded we finally came up with our sleeping arrangements. We took Caden's crib apart and reassembled it in Mikayla's room. This way both of our kids got their own beds after 2 weeks of traveling. We got a second twin mattress from a family from church and set up both on the floor in Caden's room. I emptied Caden's drawers and put all of his clothes in boxes in Mikayla's room. Sound like a lot of work? Sound exhausting the day after driving 22 hours straight? Yup, it was!
It definitely was hard in the beginning. The girls had begun bonding with another family and then they're packed up again and thrown into our chaos. Plus, what teenage girls immediately feels comfortable with people that they don't know, in a different country? I can't blame them. But throughout the 3 weeks our relationship with them grew leaps and bounds. The kids grew to love them and so did we.
The most common question was, do they speak English? Well, sort of :) They tried very hard and did an amazing job considering it's clearly their second language. We said multiple times that as much work as it was having 2, we wouldn't have wanted to only have 1. Between the 2 of them we were able to figure out about 90% of conversations. It actually was kind of fun asking a question and then watching them talk in Korean before responding in English. And what was probably the funniest aspect of this was by the end of the 3 weeks Mikayla began speaking "Korean". We would hear her playing with her dolls and animals and they weren't speaking English anymore but something that sounded an awful lot like what the girls said to each other!
The second most common question was, did they like your food? Well, sort of again :) This was the one area that Brian seemed the most concerned about for my sake. He knows me very well and I get very nervous cooking for other people. Now I was expected to make 3 weeks worth of meals to teenagers who are used to very different food. Again, I tried very hard to not over think it and simply made meals that we would normally eat. The girls were always very polite but you could clearly figure out what meals they like and which they simply ate because there was nothing else offered. We did get Chinese take out, which they really liked, and we picked up Sushi at Foodtown once which they said was pretty authentic. I enjoyed spoiling them at the food store. They picked out some pretty unhealthy snacks and foods but I figured I get to send them home after 3 weeks so if they wanted Cookie Crisp, Doritoes, and candy, that was fine with me! They did bring some Korean style Ramen noodles, which they graciously made for us. We actually enjoyed it and even ate them with chop sticks :) Oh and a funny story... they were afraid to try Dr. Pepper because they had never seen it before but by the end of the 3 weeks they came home from school and very excitedly announced that Dr. Pepper was really good and didn't taste like pepper!
I was afraid that we didn't have much to offer them and I was afraid that they would think our lives were pretty dull. I felt inadequate many times and wished we had a big fancy house, or a second home on a lake or a beach, or a pool, or some other exciting thing to entertain them. Based on our conversations both of them come from well off families and I kind of felt bad for them "sluming it" here in Prospect Park :) (When we offered them elephant rides at the fair, of which I was ecstatic about, they both said that they each had already rode an elephant, one in Korea and another in Cambodia!) But again most of those fears were eliminated. We took them to the mall, outlets, the state fair, out for ice cream, to the movies, we watched the olympics together and they always seemed very excited about it. We couldn't fake who we were and we don't live an extravagant lifestyle. And plus, they got to see and experience more things than I have done living here for 28 years, Yale, Harvard, Mets game, Times Square, Ground Zero, Empire State Building, Ellis Island, Statue of Liberty, Philadelphia, Liberty Bell, Beach, and an over night camping trip! We did learn early on that they like Mario Bros on the Wii and all 4 of us spent many evenings playing and laughing! They helped us get to World 8 and almost beat Bowser (sorry if that means nothing to you!). Either way, that was the one area that we were able to bond the most over and the amount of tears shed from laughing so hard proves that it was effective :)
There were many times during those 3 weeks that I craved our old routines and I wished we hadn't said yes. And I don't say that as a result of anything the girls did or didn't do but more as a result of our mental capacity at that time. This summer was beyond busy and the timing of this adventure was simply exhausting and draining. (we also had vacation bible school in there!) I'm not sure if I've every been that overwhelmed with life. But looking back (now months later) I am SO thankful that we said yes. At the time I was focused on the driving to and from school, the cooking and cleaning and laundry for 6 people, the chaos of our house during those weeks, and the mental exhaustion that comes with house guests. But after a lot of thought and a refocus as of late, I truly believe that God used this experience in so many ways. Our children bonded with these 2 "strangers" so strongly that Mikayla still prays for Ellen and Julia every single night before bed. We learned a lot about ourselves and realized that we had to once again lean on God completely because it would have been too much otherwise. I can't believe that in 3 short weeks (or 3 long weeks at the time!) we grew to love these 2 girls. I'm thankful that we've been able to maintain our relationship despite being a world away from one another. They keep telling us that they want to come back to the United States and that they miss us. We miss them too and maybe someday we'll travel to Korea to see all the places that they taught us about. What an amazing experience!
I thought about writing a caption for each picture but I'm feeling lazy today, so just make up your own captions :)
It was wonderful to read your reflections and look at your pictures. So glad that, looking back, it was such a good experience. :)
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